Perhaps it was happening all along during the past 24 years, I did not respond or wasn’t ready to come back.
This year, I started to see signs of God everywhere Off and on ,I would watch a Christian Program on TV. I agreed with what I was hearing but never took any positive action. Then one day they were talking about a book, where a little boy of 4 or 5 years had caught a view of Heaven while he was unconscious. His story was amazing and he knew things his parents had never told him. I purchased the book, “Heaven is For Real” and was amazed at this child’s experience. Another book the program talked about was, ” A Miracle For Jen”. Jen and her mother were on 100 Huntley Street several times. Jean also had been in a coma and when she woke up was saying praises to God. She could hardly speak but when she praised God she was clear and coherent. A shy girl before the accident, now she speaks boldly of the Lord. I called to donate to the program and to receive the book. The person on the phone line prayed for me. Reading these two books increased my hunger for God.
Also early in the year, I decided to google my former Pastor’s name and found several hits. I also discovered that someone had written a book, “Pastor Bob”. I had to get this book. The local Christian book store did not have the book, so I looked on google once again and found a publisher in Ontario who had the book. I sent for the book. When it arrived, I read it almost in one day. I was there for many of those experiences mentioned in the book and knew many of the people mentioned. I cried many tears when I read the book. I had such regret, I had wasted the last 24 years. I could have had a rich and purposeful life had I not strayed from the Lord.
After reading these books and feeling the sorrow and regret over my backsliding, I started looking up churches. At first, I was trying to find a church that met late, because I attend a breakfast 12 Step meeting every Sunday and it doesn’t end until 10:30. I only found one such church and it was downtown and quite a large congregation, I considered it but thought there must be something closer and perhaps smaller. I wanted to be part of a community church, a smaller church nearby. Still hung up on the time frame, I thought maybe I would have to settle for the church near my breakfast meeting, not very close to home.
One day, visiting my doctor, I saw a large colourful book in the waiting room. The book, “Why Am I Here?” interested me. Flipping through it I wanted this book for my coffee table. I wrote down the information and sent for the book. I received it very quickly. It had short stories of peoples’ experiences turning to Jesus, and beautiful pictures of His nature and creation.
I continued searching, I had been reading my bible for about 4 months, while from hip surgery. Also I have been praying as well. Then I started writing out my praises to God.
Still, looking for a church, I googled once again and found a church that had a smaller one not quite in my neighbourhood but a short skytrain and bus ride away. I emailed the pastor and found out they meet at 10:30 on Sunday mornings and they have a small group of 25.
I’ve now decided that I may have to find another 12 Step Group in order to go to a church I feel at home in. My desire is to be back in church with other believers.
Tomorrow will be my first time visiting this church. I will post my experience tomorrow.